What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

What is the most heartbreaking thing your child has told you?

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Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Make Nazis afraid again!

What's wrong with white women?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

What does it mean if I had a dream about my mom who passed 12 years ago waking up from her coma and asking for my dad? I have never had a dreams about her since she has been gone.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

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Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

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At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

When you visit a store, do you go to shop or buy?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

What was your best revenge story?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

What can you do if you are a full-grown adult, but never experienced being a child?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

How do I confess to my crush who had a traumatic past with his previous partner without losing the friendship?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

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After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

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Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.